December Highlights

So I figured that I'm not so adept at html or this blogging template to archive retrievable "flicks to remember", "tunes to remember" and "books to remember". The best way round this, although I've not thought it out very well, is to post a highlight reel at the end of every month so that I don't forget anything. So here's December's "...to remember"

tunes to remember dec '04



Free the Bees - The Bees



Up at the Lake - The Charlatans



Tis' the Season - Los Straightjackets

flicks to remember dec '04

Napoleon Dynamite

Hard Core Logo

House of Flying Daggers

books to remember dec '04

All Families Are Psychotic By Douglas Coupland

In December I was also into:

Reviewing the best bits and bobs of 2004

I Like

San Francisco Photos by Donald Kinney

Woolgathering

Chromasia

In the Garden

It's so cold and damp in the garden at the moment. Perfect conditions for some winter fungi. Something is eating it although I am not sure whether it is birds or slugs.

Today, I have also thoroughly investigated Flickr looking for a way to upload my photographs online so everything can be viewed together instead of spread across archives. I've worked out a couple of galleries which I am semi-happy with, but could do with heaps more material. Saying that, I have maxed out this months upload allowance already. Oh well.

Wandering Around

I've been taking my usual path through other people's publications and Making Happy makes me want to drag my lazy ass into gear. I think it is the words that she uses to punctuate her amazing pictures that I find inspiring. Her reference to photo studio pictures from the Mexican and her own photo studio story she tells really cheered me up and got me thinking.

I'm feeling a bit out of sorts today with my cough from December worse than ever. My lungs feel like they are full of water and my shoulders ache from tensing every 5 minutes. I even had to skip practise today which I feel bad about considering there aren't enough chicks for an indoor game of ultimate as it is.

Yesterday I spotted a photo opportunity near our storage facility. If I go into town early enough tomorrow morning maybe I can snatch it before the happy shoppers get there. It really was a diamond in the rough. Goodness knows who put it there - nuts, bolts and all.

Music to Warm the Cockles

Yesterday I finally got round to listening to Protest, the mini-album released by the Dears in 2003, that I downloaded from emusic about two months ago. It was nothing like I expected although it did remind me of Dazzle Ships for some reason. Maybe that's because it is a little bit bleak and cold with a maritime feel about it. Perfect for a British winter's day but don't let that put you off.

On a warmer note, Emusic keeps going from strength to strength. There is some real obscure stuff on there mainly US-based from independent labels which is worth giving a go. And then to reward you for being a little bit daring, you'll find some new release mainstream stuff like Nick Cave & the Bad Seed's Abattoir Blues. All for less than the cost of a CD a month (and that's US prices, not UK prices). I'm still trawling though heaps of Frank Black albums which I've not yet had time to give the attention that they deserve.

Emusic is also a great resource for back catalogues. I look forward to listening to my freshly downloaded Elliot Smith album. I wish they would remove the licensing restrictions that have been applied to some of the British releases though, such at Belle and Sebastian.

Ooo - Just found lots of Gorky's Zygotic Mynci. Warm those cockles because here comes the sun.

Transformers - Automobiles in Disguise

I've been investigating the possibilities for Lando C and I in Vegas. Did I mention I am going to Vegas? Huzzah! Stumbled across Kitsch Tour USA which is apparently not all Kitsch as "One cannot live by kitsch alone."




Carhenge, Nebraska would certainly be on my list of places to visit although Frank gives quite a stern tourist warning about Sydney.

I would love to visit Nebraska since I've been listening to the Bruce Springsteen state titled album. This is possibly the most moving and spirited recordings I've ever listened to. The unusual part of the project is that it was recorded in his own home in 1981 on a 4-track recorder, with only an acoustic or electric guitar, harmonica and vocals. You can even hear the cars drive by outside. Although I'm inherently against vandalising classic recordings, track 6. State Trooper is just asking for a sympathetic remix.

That reminds me. I must give that Virtual DJ software another go - a heap of fun.

Carhenge reminded me of my favourite advertisement at the moment featuring a dance-master transformer robot Citroen C4. Even Napoleon couldn't bust those D-Kwon Dance Moves.

Back to the trip. We've nailed down Penn and Teller in Vegas that's for sure. Sadly Seinfeld won't be showing up until June. Hopefully we can catch him if and when he gets here. I am sure he'll be wanting to see us.

Where shall we go today?

Ooo, yesterday's post was a little harsh. Deservedly so too I think, but need to calm that negative Karma. Oh, and Nottingham Panthers lost 2-1 on Saturday to the Coventry Blaze before I forget.



Sticking on the bad Karma trail, before I head for some light relief, I discovered the Kooks Museum site, housing kook ideas from all over the world. This vast cornucopia of forgotten, discredited and extreme ideas also includes a Hall of Hate among other interesting features. Also worth visiting is the Solution to the World Problem Exhibit, Schizophrenic Wing and Conspiracy Corridor.

Still not seen Supersize Me but thanks to Things Magazine, I have now seen its alter ego Bowling for Morgan. Like Fast Food Nation supressed my compulsion to eat at the Golden Arches, Scott Caswell has quenched my thirst to see the movie that made McDonald's spit chips.

Ooo and I forgot another thing. On Saturday night, coming back from a few JD's and some magnificant bar pizza after the game, our cab driver got busted by the rozzers. As soon as I saw the flashing blue lights reflecting on the partition glass in the black cab, I got this instant feeling of guilt - "oh my god, I'm being drunk driven". Then I swiftly realised that being drunk driven isn't a crime, but your cabbie taking a no left turn at the train station is. After 10 minutes, sitting in the back of the cab with no driver wondering what the hell was going on, the female cop popped her head through the window, explaining that we'd be off again in about two minutes but he'd been caught doing "something". JD spoke rather lose lipped (or was it me?), "for using his mobile whilst driving?".

And we continued our wait again, for another 15 minutes. It was worth it though, our cab fair home was half of what it usually is and soon there'll be one less lunatic on the road to worry about.

2005 Hall of Hate - Inductee No.1

So here we go. Number 1, so far on the 2005 Hall of Hate is: The Ha! Ha! Bar, Weekday Cross, downtown Nottingham. Lando C and I went here on Saturday to grab some dinner in time for the Panthers Hockey Game. Didn't I just wish that I'd waited for the dog-burger at the Ice Stadium instead?

Mistake number one - just because there is a bright pink, nicely printed cocktail menu on each table, do not think that this means there is necessarily anyone behind the bar capable of making one. The poor guy ("Sorry - I'm new today, and they left me running this bar on this busy Saturday afternoon") had to get the Manager, who got round to making it about 15 minutes later and left it on the bar, despite saying they'd bring it over.

Mistake number two - just because there is a nicely designed A-board outside promoting the establishment as a Health Bar, supplemented by (again) bright pink printed flyers telling us to "Detox as we Dine", do not think that this necessarily means that you are entering a healthy environment full of punters still hooked on their New Years Resolution. If you can, try to find a clean table through the K2 pile of ashtrays, pint glasses and cigarette smoke. The "Ha! Ha! Health Bar". Yeah right. More like Smoke 'em if you got 'em.

Mistake number three - just because the menu claims to have taken inspiration from across the globe, conjuring up a mouth-watering winter menu in a microwave free zone, do not think that this necessarily means that your dinner wasn't already sitting on the side, overcooked and ready to be dished out in a matter of minutes. We managed to get a steak (wrestle with the gristle) burger, Tempura chilli onion rings with home-made tzatziki (don't you mean just "Onion Rings") and a Ha!Ha! Japanese platter, in less time than it took to serve our drinks. I will actually say that the fresh salmon coated with sesame seeds part of the platter was OK, but everything else had been nuked with natural ingredients and love, a week last Thursday.

Not once did any of the serving staff approach us to see if we were happy with our meal. Not once in the 45 minutes we were there did any staff clear away any plates/glasses or ashtrays from any of the tables. Too busy laughing in the kitchen I imagine.

And how much did this all cost. It was over £30.00.

We'd been had. I can't stop repeating in my head my buddy at the game whilst stuffing a delicious £2.95 Hot Dog down his throat, "The Ha! Ha! Bar - well the joke was on you!". And indeed it was.

Welcome Ha! Ha! You've made it! You are officially inducted to the Paradise Circus 2005 Hall of Hate. Well done.

Tell me why? I don't like Mondays.

Today is apparently the most depressing day of the year, scientists have discovered. Righty-o-then. According to the formula 1/8W+(D-d) 3/8xTQ MxNA, we're all due to find the nearest bridge before midnight and hurl ourselves off it. And the radio stations have been going nuts getting us all to text or email in with (insert cheesy DJ tones here) "good day/bad day -how's it been for yooooouuuu?". Well Disco-Stu, I'd put money on it's you driving me to Trent Bridge with rocks in my pockets and not so much the men in white coats and a mathamatical formula.

Actually, so far this year there has been very little to whine about but this is where it starts. Here beginnith the 2005 Hall of Hate, compiled of experiences, establishments and people who have all gone out of their way to make it difficult for me this year or who have failed to live up to that which they promised on the menu. I'm going to see if it becomes inadvertantly a Top 100 Hall of Hate '05 instead, but we'll see how it goes. I'm a lover not a hater.

I Believe in the BBC

There have been few movements in media history as important as the "I Believe in the BBC" campaign courtesy of Bloggerheads. Since the broadcast of "that" Today programme and the beating unleashed in the Hutton enquiry that followed, the future of the BBC nearly 12 months on, is still not cast in stone.

To be fair, I don't watch as much of Aunty Beeb as I did as a child, preferring the American imports that only Sky (and occasionally Channel 4) seem to be able too afford. However, when it comes to radio, the news, special interest shows and British comedy, only the Beeb consistently delivers.

Where would I be without 6 Music single handedly keeping the music scene alive? Who else has embraced the digital-age with dignity, educating us as we go. Who else constantly strives for unbiased journalism and news reporting that isn't geared around the next commercial break? Certainly not Sky or SkyNews, the Fox network, ITV, Virgin Radio...

For less than the cost of my monthly Pinot Grigio intake, I can be sure that when I switch on the TV or Radio, at some point in the near future, there will be something worth watching or listening to geared around my tastes, my lifestyle and my humour. And I know that I don't need to buy a packet of washing powder or endure yet another Blame Direct advertisement before I get there.

There's a Whole World Out There...

...and it's doing it better than me.

Things Magazine is an online-resourse based on a publication of all things interesting "founded in 1994 by a group of writers and historians based at the Victoria & Albert Museum/Royal College of Art in the belief that objects can open up new ways of understanding the world". You could get lost for days.

I've recently joined the space-race to get myself a Gmail account although after viewing a provocative short film (via Things Magazine) on what might happen if Google gets too big for its boots, I now wonder if I'm just feeding the monster.

Being a flying phobe, I was pleased to read that air disasters are down although it's rather unnerving that the press don't want to make a big deal about it. Can't recall how I found this article.

Those wizards at Threadless.com have come up with a new twist to t-shirt design. DIY at OMG Clothing. No design experience required. My favourites so far are (and links they have inspired me to visit):

1. You're lucky I'm out of mind-bullets.

2. You Blog Like a Girl.

3. My boombox can beat up your ipod.

4. Oh Grandma. Put the knife down.

5. Someone's got a case of the Mondays.

6. Slower than the second coming of Jesus.

The Daily Trawl

Here are some sites I visited recently that are worth a mention:

Help yourself to lost treasures from around the world at the Unclaimed Baggage Center.

Get lost for hours in a medley of pop-culture at Lileks, in particular the Institute of Official Cheer and Restaurant Postcards.

The John Peel Sweet Eating Game in memory of my celebrity Dad.

Retro-Vintage Vegas

Nostalgia for Old Motels and other anthemic buildings. I probably won't see anything resembling this on my trip. Best to appreciate it now.

I'm Hip Hop Stoppin' Goin' to Las Vegas - Yeah!!!

Lando C has announced my birthday present! Woohoo I'm going to Vegas!

We'll be staying just off the Strip itself at the Tuscany Suites and Casino, for a little bit of Italy in Vegas.

I can't wait to see famous landmarks such as the Bellagio Fountains, The Star Tek Experience, Eiffel Tower, Graceland Wedding Chapel, among a million other places.

Arizona rocked so hard last year, especially staying at the Camel Back Inn (the hotel that we would never be able to afford to stay at again) resort. This will be going all the way as Lando C won't have to work! Huzzah!

Celluloid Memory Lapse

I've seen a few films since Christmas and I am worried that I am not going to be able to remember anything about them. It gets a bit annoying when agree to watch a film that you don't think you've seen and then discover halfway through that you have in fact seen it and oh, there you go, you've just realised that you know how it's all going to end. Grrr...

So in December, I watched House of Flying Daggers at the Broadway Cinema. I enjoyed the cinematography, choreography and costumes in similar vain to Croaching Tiger Hidden Dragon although I remember getting a little tired of the tooing and frowing between Mei, Jin and Leo towards the end. Incredible film though.

So far this January I have seen on DVD some real no-brainers and loved them all. Chronicles of Riddick featuring my celebrity mother, Judi Dench was a real surprise with some great one-liners from Vin Diesel. Despite the fact that I don't think it was filmed anywhere and relied heavily on CGI, it looked pretty real to me.

I had Saturday to myself and watched The Hours. This was a complex movie with much symbolism to watch out for (lots of breaking eggs into bowls, red artwork on walls and blue flowers - don't ask me what it means though). I very much related to the overall feeling of depression suffered by the women involved and their obligation to smile at all times. It was quite heavy going but worth the trip.

On Sunday Lando C and I ventured to the Showcase to see Team America: World Police. It's worth visiting the website for this movie, if not just the film itself. I also love the rating for this movie "Graphic, crude and sexual humor, violent images and strong language; all with puppets." That is all I need to say.

And last night, to completely fulfill my need for dumbed-down movies, I watched Elf. I have a real soft spot for Christmas movies and this one did it all for me. I especially liked the beginning credits which replicate the artwork in 1950s' children's books wonderfully. It's going into my list of favourite Christmas movies including It's a Wonderful Life and How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

Terrible Two's - Is This A Sign?

This is the first time that I have participated in the Photo Friday Challenge.

Almost everywhere you turn in the city, there seems to be construction or preferably - regeneration - going on. Consequently, there are many blank canvases for graffiti artists around, although most of it is sadly wasted with repetitive dumb signatures or dumb racist slogans. So if you are a graffiti artist, and a good one - come to Nottingham!

I was a bit traumatised when I took this picture, as I had just pieced together a series of coincidences that had got me there.

Whilst cooking breakfast this morning, I broke two eggs, one right after the other. I rarely ever break an egg let alone two. Then checking the newspaper I'd bought earlier, it appeared that I had two copies of the same supplement. Imagine my horror as two large charicatured Barbra Streisand's stared up at me from the table. Finally, as I drove the big red van down town to take this picture, someone crashed into me which dealt their car a heavy blow and not so much as a scratch on mine (what a tank!). I then saw the same accident not two miles down the road from the one I'd just been involved in, featuring exactly the same model of car.

And the theme for this week's challenge is Signs! That's one long trip to Irony Corner. Or should that be Coincidence Corner?

Acclaimed Music

This site is brilliant (thanks Lando C) - Acclaimed Music. Henrik Franzon has kindly compiled the best albums and singles for every year since 1956. Using statistical analysis (he's a Swedish statistician) and critics lists from all over the world, he has been able to write a computer program that defines the most recommended rock albums and singles of all time.

My favourite years in music are 1994, 1996, and 2001.

2004 is also looking good.

Attention to Detail

I need to remember Lornix Photography (thanks to I Like). Lori Nix is an artist who bends the line between truth and illusion by photographing model scenes. Her work is inspired by disaster movies of the 1970s' and her life in Kansas. I particularly like Wasps for its vivid colours and depth of field. Her work displays such close attention to detail and patience for her art.

Yesterday I played my first outdoor game of Ultimate for the 2005 although I was more like a passenger on pitch than a player. The ground was nice and soft but the discs were cold and hard. I played reasonably well considering I am carrying 5 pounds of excess cheese and biscuits around my middle alone and the gusty conditions made me too nervous to play many upwind points. We won three out of four games which is irrelevant to me really but I am sure that it made playing more fun on a subconscious level.

Woolly Jumpers and Bare Feet

On Wednesday I bravely attempted a yoga class at the gym. I've not been for ages (either yoga or the gym) and I was a little intimidated on entering the room as half the class were already bare foot and eagerly attempting semi-complex poses. This was seven minutes before the class was even due to start.

The yoga teacher, donned in an expertly hand-knitted blue woolly jumper and black baggy pants did well to put me a ease. I've been putting off going to the gym or any kind of fitness class since I foolishly renewed my membership in August, largely due to worrying about what other people think. What if I don't work out hard enough, will the gym staff see? Will Lando C think my face isn't red enough when I get home? Perhaps I won't lose any weight at all and everyone will think I go to the gym just to sit in the jacuzzi and relax.

Although I love yoga, I normally smirk at the yoghurt-knitting mentality of some of its teachers and followers. However, this guy clearly hadn't overdosed on organic muesli that morning and was making rational observations such as - "to compare yourself to others is an insult to your own intelligence." Yoga isn't about being able to successfully put your right knee behind your left ear or even admiring those that can. Too much fat on your bones or not, it's all about recognising your inner being before your outer being and this takes an entirely new strength most of us don't even realise we have.

I went home feeling two foot taller and fully relaxed, with a rare craving for some herbal tea. Maybe I'll get some muesli tomorrow...

Back to the Grindstone

Back to work for 2005. It's been a quiet day really - not much email other than from those guys who insist that I need Cialis every ten minutes. If you're getting it this often, you can't possibly need any help. I wish Zen would take some performance enhancing drugs and get me a decent spam filter.

And what's even worse - Nigerian 419 Money Scammers are now visiting my business website and filling their crap into my online forms. I wonder if it's worth joining the baiting index - at least you feel like you're sticking one to them.

Ooo - just found a game that I sent to my friend Tony the Pickle a while ago. This is a great virtual-office doss for anyone who works from home.